The Invisible Weight of Olympic Gold

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Pushkin. [singing] Hey, Slight Changers. So I love the Olympics. Every two years, I get totally obsessed, and then I experience at least a month of withdrawal when the games are over. As a cognitive scientist, I'm particularly fascinated by the mindset of Olympians. I'm curious about their psychological journeys, from the moment they pick up a sport, to the final push out of the race gate, to the aftermath of their careers when they can no longer compete at the highest levels. Not long ago, I had the honor of speaking with five-time Olympic gold medalist, swimmer Missy Franklin, who competed in both the 2012 and 2016 Summer Olympics. When Missy returned for her second Olympics, things felt markedly different. Rather than having nothing to prove, she now had everything to prove, and the pool felt like a pressure cooker. In our conversation, Missy spoke bravely about how her mental health suffered behind the scenes, and how she began to heal. With the Olympics in full swing right now, it felt like the perfect time to share this episode with you. I hope you enjoy it. [singing]

I remember sitting behind the wheel just crying the entire way to practice, and just knowing that I was gonna go, and that I was about to jump into a freezing cold pool and swim for two hours and be disappointed with how I did.

Swimmer Missy Franklin won four Olympic gold medals as a teenager, but as she trained for her second Olympics, she found herself unexpectedly struggling. With so much to defend, the pool suddenly felt like a pressure cooker.

This is not just a swim meet, this is who I am, and if I don't do this, why am I here? What is my worth? I have none if I can't do this and do it well. [singing]

On today's episode, when the loss of an identity threatens your self-worth. I'm Maya Shankar, and this is A Slight Change of Plans, a show about who we are and who we become in the face of a big change. [singing] At just 17 years old, Missy Franklin was laser-focused on